This is a list of 10 items you should NOT buy as gifts. Each year, as a public service, ShopInPrivate.com – The World’s Most Private Store releases a list of gifts to avoid. You see, we sell items that are embarrassing to buy. Products that solve personal issues and embarrassing conditions are our specialty. Unfortunately, people can get confused and try to give these items as gifts.
10. Knicker Stickers – http://www.shopinprivate.com/knicker-sticker-disposable-underwear.html - Knicker Stickers are stick on pads that allow you to “go commando” a number of times before you wash your jeans. Like many products that we sell, they seem to be almost useful, but probably not at all.
9. After Trace – http://www.shopinprivate.com/after-trace-natural-scent-neutralizer.html - After Trace is a scent neutralizing spray for women. It is 90% organic and allows women to smell clean and feel sexier. There is no chance that they will ever feel sexier if you give them this as a gift though.
8. Vexum Double Chin Lotion - http://www.shopinprivate.com/vexum-double-chin-cream.html – Not everything we sell is snake oil. Many products on ShopInPrivate.com work quite well, are made by reputable companies, and have long histories of satisfied customers, and then there is Vexum… Really?
7. Fresh Breasts / Fresh Balls – http://www.shopinprivate.com/fresh-breasts-powder.html / http://www.shopinprivate.com/fresh-balls.html Lotions to keep your private parts free of perspiration are not good gifts, EVER.
6. The Go Girl – http://www.shopinprivate.com/go-girl-female-urination-device.html This handy little funnel allows women to pee while standing up, which would seem really handy while camping or using a porta john, except that you end up holding a pee-soaked funnel when it is all over.
5. Pubic Hair Dye – http://www.shopinprivate.com/smbicopuhady.html - Perhaps you partner is going grey down there, perhaps the curtains don’t match the drapes, maybe you just want to see how they would look in the color purple, either way, pubic hair dye is probably best left a personal choice. .
4. A Back and Body Hair Trimmer – http://www.shopinprivate.com/remington-back-groomer.html - We are actually big fans of this product. It allows you to trim your own back and body hair, all of it. This is great for the shaver and fantastic for the person who used to have to shave them, but I doubt that either individual would appreciate the gift.
3. Subtle Butt – http://www.shopinprivate.com/subtle-butt.html - Buying a gift for someone else that benefits yourself never works. Let’s be clear, your friend is proud of his smelly gas. He probably basks in it. He will never use these stick on pads that absorb the odor of flatulence.
2. The Shades of Grey Necktie – http://www.shopinprivate.com/shades-of-grey-tie.html - Cheap neckties are terrible Christmas gifts even if you use them to tie up your lover in the same way as a fictional billionaire.
Finally, The Worst Christmas Gift of 2012:
1. Trunk in my Junk - http://www.shopinprivate.com/daburwipform.html – This almost indescribable product is used to pad your underpants so that it looks like you are well endowed. Really. Yes, we sell this.
ShopInPrivate.com is the world’s most private store. We sell anything that would be embarrassing to buy in person. If you have an embarrassing condition that needs attention, you can shop in private for a cure at ShopInPrivate.com. The purchase will be easy, delivery will be fast, and we hold your personal information in the strictest of confidence. We just want you to remember that some items are best purchased for oneself.